Epiblog

The first day if relaxation after a very good nights sleep.
A leisurely breakfast with several coffees, eggs, bacon, toast , muesli fruit etc
Followed by - a leisurely bikeride of only 50 miles in the hills around Cesinatico. The bike almost flies without  the panniers.
Robin did note that my rear wheel was a bit wonky yesterday- and guess what? Two further spoke nipples broke yesterday so my favourite surgical procedure was performed this afternoon (i am getting very good and fast at it!!) before I had a fantastic massage in the spa. No nipples broken but it was close!!
Tomorrow Robin is cycling up to meet Yvette in Bologna (he has been fantastic company and without his navigation skills we would probably have ended up in Lapland) whereas I will stick around, ride to San Morino, eat some more and allow my body to recover.

So what have we learned on this trip?
Don't trust the weather or historic data- wherever you go expect a headwind.
Don't plan 100+ mile distances per day unless you are supported i.e. Carry nothing (apart from spare nipple spokes!!). Cycle tracks are not always tarmac'ed - some are, some are gravel, some pepples and some boulders dropped from a passing spaceship! Bring very very little that ways more than a credit card!
Don't expect France to be open for business - any business.
Don't expect the Swiss to smile- if they do they may have stepped on something pointed and a puncture will soon happen! And they will charge you - a lot!!
Shit happens - mechanical breakdowns, getting lost, inclement weather. But that's life!!
If you have a dream/plan/wish- get off your backside and do it for tomorrow may be too late. What makes God smile? He smiles when he hears about our plans. So carry them out before he hears and surprise him!
People are generally friendly and helpful.
Europe has places of outstanding beauty and there is no better way to enjoy them than from a bike. If you want to look or take pictures - just stop pedalling (i'm told this may not be the case if there is a tailwind but I have little experience in these matters!)
European cuisine is wonderful and local food is generally fantastic.
Beer is good for you (in moderation),
Wine ditto
Good company ditto - but here no moderation applies.
All in a all it has been a great adventure- thanks to our families for allowing us to do it, to strangers for helping us out and being kind, and to you for bearing up with my musing (yes, reader- I mean you!)
Ciao!!!!

The last day / a draft

this I believe is day 12 but I am loosing track of where and when - why was lost a long time ago!
Our charming hostess in Divinis as I believe the restaurant/hotel was called made it up just before us - the local guests who arrived as we were leaving yesterday evening (including one in complete cowboy outfit) kept her up till 0200. Well supported by beer and cigarettes (I did tell her that smoking gives her wrinkles and even played the Ray Gelato song Fuma for her!!) - now where was I? - yes she made it just in time to serve us a rather rudimentary breakfast before we headed off - and she very likely headed back to bed. For us it was into the wind - the only difference between the French and the Italian wind is the temperature - the Italian one is warm - but still right smack in our noses.
We plodded on through very uninspiring scenery - flat as a pancake, dry as a Dodo (were they really dry?), each village looking the same as the last. We followed the river Po - absolutely massive - wide as an extremely extremely large elephant's bottom (miles!) - by the way we have seen and crossed  some rivers on our trip - the Thames, the Somme, the Mosel, the Rhine, the Meuse and tomorrow we will cross the Rubicon - now where are my dice? The Po led us to Ferrare - pretty but not jaw dropping- when you have seen a few dozen cathedrals you become a bit blasé about them.
We then headed for Ravenna but some snotty little river threw a spanner in the works / the ferry meant to carry us across it broke down and we had to do a 10kgravel tracked detour into the b.... wind blowing along the b... Snotty river. We did see loads of Flamingos but that was really not why we started on this journey. And we also geard some nightingales. - now that is lovely (thanks, Peter).
So we pushed on and on and on (hands up if you are still reading this!) and suddenly (if that word can ever be used about a painstakingly slow process into the wind ( and we are talking about big branches and trees swaying) the sign Cessinatico indicated that we had reached the end of our journey. We did 130 miles the last day (for those of you in metric that is >200 km into the wind - well headwind is the same in imperial and metric!) and the applause when we entered the dining room at the Riz did make us feel slightly emotional about the whole thing.
We did it, we b.... well did it 1000+ miles of wind and rain and very very good company - just a shame that Paul could not stay with us till the end.
Now for a good nights sleep....…

Day 11 of soon not so many more!

Another sunny hot day in Paradise - plenty of apples but no snakes!
We left the beautiful lake d'Iseo and followed a twisting route to lake Garda - also lovely! A quick sandwich and rehydration (no this is work - no alcohol!) and on south wards.
The landscape is completely different - gone are the snowcapped mountains, the vineyards are still there but now wheat fields, barley etc.pretty little villages eith massive churches and VERY FEW ICECREAM PARLOURS!!!!! I thought that in Italy even the statues on the squares sold ice cream but no!!!
We passed through the rather beautiful Brescia ( no we've never heard of it either but it was lovely).
After 90+ miles in temp at around 30* we called it a day at another lovely little hotel about 20 miles north of Ferrare. In spite of having emptied 6 bottles of water we broke our solemn pledge of no alcohol before the pre-dinner drinks and had some lovely cool local beers on arrival- double malt beer , lovely!!
The lycra is all washed - ready for a shower and then the table calls!
Our hostess greated us with another local brew on the terrasse and then (with the help of mama and mama grande) served a fantastic meal with proscuiotto, soup ang gnocchi with freshly made foccaccio with melted cheese, local beef followed by sorbet and coffee. Now how are we going to get up those stairs?
Cesinatico is "only" 120 miles away snd we may make it tomorrow!! Pray for northerly or westerly winds - right now they are ..... Yes, south easterly!!! Buna Notte!!

Day number God-only-Knows - Como to Lago d'Iseo

The morning ritual is always the same - up at 0700 local time, check that all washed gear is dry, generous breakfast at 0730 and aim to set off at 0800.
Como did not want us to leave - within 1 km if the lovely towncentre an 8-14% climb started and it went in for 4 miles. After that rocky paths up and down, intermittently tarmac'ed paths next to rivers or lakes. There were hundreds if not thousands of Italians out on their bikes - some in the Sunday groups in club outfits but far more families of all ages rolling along the lanes. Lovely to see!
We normally stop for a coffee after 20-25 miles and for lunch after 40ish miles. Today we just had a sandwich and several Oranginas after yet another climb. It is sunny and very hot work - we empty 4-6 waterbottles each during the day.
The scenery is still lovely slthough slighly less mountaineous - you won't hear me complain sbout that, one thing that is noticeable is how clean it us (yes this is Italy but the same applies to France snd Switzerland ) - there are no empty bottles, fast food package etc along the lanes. How come all the pigs are concentrated in the UK? No, don't blame Danish bacon!
We have arrived to lake Iseo - home of the fabulous Riva yachts which are built next to our rather posh hotel, Cocca Hotsl, Royal Thai Spa - have great expectations re food and entertainment. As our windows overlook the lake there is certainly plenty of hydro entertainment!! And in case you wonder - all cycling gear was washed before we are - ready for tomorrow!!

Day 8 - Airolo to Como - south is not always down , nor is down(?)

We left the magnificent hotel Forni in Areolo just below St. Gotthardt and headed down the valley - both dressed for a long cold descent. Disappointingly the descent was over rather quickly and we were soon faced with further climbs - by the end of the day  almost 900 metres up and 1800 down over a 90 mile trek.
However we are in absolutely unbelieveably beautiful countryside with lovely friendly people. There is a dramatic difference between the northern Swiss (athe women are a  bit like Angela Merkel - even the waitresses will happily run you over if you are in their way! And the cyclists!!! If you get a nod from them it is due to a speed bump!!) and the Italian side of Switzerland we have just been through ( lots of ciaos and bon giornos (sorry about the spelling) - the rather (sometimes even extremely ) pretty girls in the cafes try their hardest to please the customers and the food is great).
So we are having a great time! Arrived to lovely Como late afternoon and thanks to Robin's navigation skills quickly found the rather elegant hotel. Across the street there is a Catalan restaurant where we have just finished a fantastic  meal - the owner (male!!) recommended that we tried two kinds of Argentinian and one kind of Australian meat - argentina won no contest!! Plus lovely vegetables and puddings, Spanish red and Balarian digestif! Fortunately we only had a 10 metres walk home! A great day with beautiful weather,
Tomorrow we are heading east slong the lakes. We are on target for Cesinatico arrival Tuesday orcWednesday. Bon noite !!l

shock news - breakdown of the Coalition. Beer sales plummet. Waitresses fear for their livelyhood

The governments in London, Paris, Berne, Berlin and Rome expressed their shock and sorrow at the overnight collapse of the coalition.
 Brian Cookson of the ICU were too emotional to talk to the press but issued a brief statement suggesting that international cycling is in turmoil.
The facts are that after 7 days one of the coalition partners, the Hon P Callow (PC) has left the three party coalition to return to his constituency. He was regarded as the ascending star of the team although others pointed out that he came down pretty fast too.
The coalition which was set up as the brain (?) child of the Hon S Sidevind will now continue as a duo with the Hon Robin Youngs and Mr S. Mr Youngs will continue in charge of the overall strategic planning, setting a course for the daily targets etc. Mr S is responsible for aggriculture (espec barley, wheat, hops and grape produce). Mr C's brief, very fast transport on land will be shared between the remaining partners possibly at a slightly slower pace
Mr Sidevind points out that the agreement from the start was a fixed-term 7 day arrangement and that it has shown that PR works in practice. Unfortunately PC was more a  First Past The Post man but it is not ruled out that he will return to the team in the future. Mr C will from his constituency remain a spokesman for Home Office, small businesses incorporating Family Affairs.
All partners regret the break-up but look forward to a new Coalition set up in the near future.we feel that there is a public demand and we aim to please (ourselves as well!!).
Now to other news-
we left Luzerne after a great breakfast served by a very attractive young lady (did I mention that the girl in the coffee shop yesterday evening received top marks from all attending?) - and followed the lake southwards. It was another sunny beautiful morning with little wind. The scenery was stunning - azure blue lake, lush green foliage and snow capped mountains. We crossed the lake on a small ferry (crewed by a nice Sri Lankan who possibly had lost his way but not his charm). Paul then turned north to head back towards Basel and home wheras Robin and I turned towards St Gotthardt - it was sad to see Paul ride off - he has been great company  - whenever we could keep up with him!!!
After a frugal lunch we started the climb - 10 miles or so at a gradient of 5-8 occasionally 16%. The weather dry, sunny 20*. Near The top we were treated to a headwind but it did not slow us down much (at our speed it was difficult to tell if it did or did not!). Due to snow the pass is still closed to all traffic and we had to take a train through the tunnel just below Andermatt.
We are now set up in a comfy hotel and tomorrow the grand descend into Italy awaits us!

What a difference a day makes!!

I have probably used that gitle before after some muserable day beyween Lands End and John O'G - but it describes my sentiments!!
We left communist-era inspired Basel at 0800 and quickly found the route (robin and his garmin is the combination to go for!)
We soon were outside the city in absolutely lovely lush scenery , pretty small villages, and more and more hills. Before lunch we had climbed almost 1000 metres at 12-16% - all stayed on the pedals - no headwind!!
We had a great Italian lunch in small village (in contrast to France where cafes or restaurants are rare commodities, in Switzerland a village consits of two or more houses of which at least one is in the catering trade). Onwards following the river upstream (there is a colossal amount of water in this contry - the rivers are mostly near the top of their banks and the flow is rather frightening - but hydroelectric power? Not much evidence of that!)
Arrived at our destination Luzerne on the lake in the late afternoon.  an absolutely beautiful city surrounded by snow-capped mountains. Lots of cafes and restaurants. We are staying in a delightful old hotel on the top of a steep hill - but we are used to that (hills!).
Tomorrow is the Italian border - and sadly goodbye to Paul who is heading home. He has been a super companion and will be much missed! Until we go off on our next adventure (i hope Nicola is not reading this!)
It has been a fantastic day with excellent cycling, great ups and downs finished off with roasted suckling pig - washed down with a special brau. We will sleep well tonight!
Hope you all remembered to vote- we did! As if it makes a hoot of a difference with our ridiculous FPTP voting system!!

More Shadow than Fax

Day 6 (I think, they blend into one)
We left lovely Strasbourg along the canal tow paths - 20'ish miles of straight route with inclines only where there was a sluice. We then turned towards the Alsace wine region and its pretty villages. And who did we meet? Our old friend the headwind with gusts of 60kmh! The speed of our steeds was reduced to a very slow pace. The scenery was lovely but progress was hard.
 A large salad lunch in Ribeauville whilst watching the local resident stork being fed at a backdoor did revive us somewhat but I was limping on less than one cylinder - a mixture of possible dehydration and general bwadddrr!
South of Colmar we crossed the Rhein and carried on on German soil - more cafes but poorer quality roads than in France - what have they spent all those Greek IOUs on?
Somewhere along the way we boarded a train and arrived in Basel by early evening - 80'something miles of hard work and we went food hunting. What a grim place - Swiss architecture and city planning have few redeeming factors and the only impressive encounters are the prices of even simple meals. After a long search se decided that the hotel was the best option before the beds called us.  Day 7 and the fun will start- the hills and mountains are now calling- we are aiming for Lucerne somewhere way up there!! Big breakfast and we're off! Auf Wiedersehn, Pets!!!

Shadowfax

What a day! A rather restless night in IBIS/IKEA land woken up by traffic noise and heavy downpour we had a rather rudimentary breakfast before loading up the steeds. The weather was dry and it gradually became sunny and - now pinch your inner what-evers- tailwindy! As usual we lost our bearings and headed up a double- v hill (>12%) in error. Paul managed it in tha saddle,  the rest of us felt that our horses needed a rest and we walked them up. From then on we flew wind behind us 17-20 mph through beautiful undulating deserted scenery (ever tempted to buy a chateu in rural France? Don't - it is completely empty! No shops no cafes no nothing! ) We stopped for the application of sunscreen in an almost deserted village and a chap approached us clutching a thermos. He invited us for tea and we had a great chat and tea with a Parisian journalist now living in the middle of nowhere with his 200 metres (yes that is correct!) of bookshelves! We raced on towards Alsace via Nancy but to catch up due to time lost in the Picardian headwinds we boarded a train for the last part. We have now had a fantastic meal in beautiful Strasbourg preceded by a very tasty dark Fischer ale followed by a fizzy Cremant d'Alsace and then accompanied by a Grand Cru Riesling. It has been a great day in a beautiful country in great company.
Shadowfax? "Run like the wind, Shadowfax" - and that is what we finally did. Life is good!!

this is more like it!! Reims to Bar le Duc

Day Four - let there be light, and there was light
And hills and still a bit of headwind!
Anyway got up early to an excellent breakfast buffet at hotel Campanille - great value and location!
The breakfast was so good that we did not get going until 0830 - inspite of the almost blue skies and less malignant movements of the air (wind just in front of a sidewind  - a great improvement.) We got lost getting out of Reims and the canal path had been cleaned with soap or similar over night - very wet and very very slippery. We stayed upright,  found the route and quickly lost it again but did make progress. The French countryside and villages have very few cafes/restaurants/shops and we therefore stopped at the only one we came across   after 35'ish miles. We had a great starter buffet (enormous), chicken and pasta, pudding, coffee and as our WSW friend Geoff had caught up with us a caraffe of vin rouge. Total bill for 4 - 60€ !!! The lunch did take a bit longer than our average snack and we decided to limit our travel distance to 75 miles and will be spending the night in one of these modern IKEA-type hotels built on top of a hill - to get there you have to self -assemble a ladder and scale an open drainage canal and a grassy embankment - I have photographic evidence to publish when I learn how to do that! We expect Geoff to join us for a meal in one of the nearby hill-top establishments providing he remembers to bring a ladder! Anyway - the first good day of cycling where the only moisture was created by sweating up the hills -641 metres of ups and very very few of downs (and none of eider!(sorry))

arras - Reims

Day 3
Into the wind!
We left Arras this morning with the rain soaked flags on the square pointing in the direction that any sensible person would travel - but we are not and we did not!!
You are probably familar with the hats fishermen wear when inclement weather is brewing- yes Sou'wester. Now have you ever heard of Sou'Easters?? - well soon you will because we will market them! The whole day we had the wind and rain right in our less than enthusiastic looking faces as we were cycling through lanscapes littered with cementaries with the poor young chaps who were sent to the trenches. At least the weather helped us maintain our sombre mood! Onwards south eastwards
We had the first stop in St Quentin where we on the rainsoaked square found an excellent establishment to  fill our bellies with large doses of protein and carbs - and several litres of Orangina.
We sped (perhaps not an accurate description!) on up and down hills and as the rain increased we reached Laon - about 20 miles from Reims and we decided that mortal men could do no more and we bought traintickets for Reims (bikes free- vive la France!!) - the moment the tickets were bought the rain stopped and blue skies appeared! That didn't fool us and we stuck to iur plan snd boarded the train for Reims where we have just had an excellent meal accompanied by some local barley brew Affligem rouge and Edelweiss - small glasses, we are pilgrims on a mission! On the way back there was a spectacular Son et Lumiere show in the cathedral with bagpipes, choral music and organ recitals ( we only had two beers each, honest!). It was a beautiful warm evening and we do have some expectations for tomorrow when we will hopefully meet up with Feoff from back home!
Todays travel was 75 miles, 970 metres up and a few down. No mechanicsl mishaps today!!

Day 3. Headwind and horizintal rain!
When a fisherman expects wet weather he puts what on his head? Correct - a Sou'West! Who the heck has ever heard of a Sou'East!??? WelL I bet they will soon be in fashion - we are planning a production

Day 2 of the epic journey!
I am having a few blogging problems - at my age it is often another B but not yet.
The first two blogs have been posted but heaven knows where they have gone!
Made it to Dover thru and unseasonal and inhispitable easterly wind - yes my blogname is sidevind meaning sidewind but should be headwind! We visited Canterbury - the official start of the pilgrimage route to Rome. I talked the ticket office out of charging us £31,50 as we are pilgrims!! Made it up and down the Kent'ish mountains and arrived to Dover 87 miles and 13-1400 metres of climbing. On to the ferry and off again (not for bad behaviour!) on to hotel Metropole on Rue Royal - excellent, fantastic breakfast!
This morning we started on smooth roads, still with a b... Strong b... Easterly wind! Several mechanical disasters, my jockey sheel dropped off the brand new derailleur and later I broke a spoke nipple broke and the brand new wheel (made by Rocketboy who if he comes near me will get a rocket up his backside!!!) had to be dismantled and repair done.
We made it to Arras after 75 miles and 950 metres of climbing nor including the three flights of stairs to our rooms. Now we Re having the first beer of the day (2010 hrs!!) and the day does not look too bad! Tomorro towards the Champagne capital, Reims. Not headwind again, ppppppppplease!!!

London- Cesinatico May 2015

Pre-blog London- Cesinatico, Italy
April  2015
A glutton for more punishment! It is a week today and Paul, Robin and I will set off from Stratford in London heading eastwards,southwards and upwards. We will cycle (yes no engines apart from what our bibshorts contain (no, a bit lower than that!) via Canterbury, Dover, Calais, Arras, Reims (did you know that the "m" is silent? Well now you do!), Strasbourg, Basel , Andermatt, St Gotthardt, Como, Verona, Ferrare, Bologna, Ravenna to Cesinatico on the Adriatic coast where my cycle club as usual has a training camp. And  as I will do almost anything to avoid Ryan Air I decided to cycle there. And fortunately others have agreed to come along. Paul claims that there is pressing work to be done so he will leave us in Switzerland. The total journey is probBly around 1200 miles - with some mountains thrown in for good measure - and some vineyards!!
And after 2 long'ish cycle rides (LEJOG 2013, and the southern part of the North Sea Route) I have finally learnt to limit my pannier content - 8 kg and that is not bad when you are 6'5 /186 cm!) and  the route has been logged on to Garmin ( can be found on www.gpsies.co.uk). The tyres are puncture resistent 4 Season 28 mm to give some comfort (???).
So onemore week of repacking, unpacking,discarding items, repacking etc. Most other preparations sorted- an important one takes place tonight- the Bury Beer Festival - carboloading as Darren, my companion on last year's trip calls it. Well a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do!
I have been asked if I do it for charity - well I didn't plan to but I will donate to Kids Company in London and if anyone else wants to then that will be much appreciated. I will set up a justgiving page!
Now off to do some training - by bike naturally ! Salut!!